March 27, 2013

"Progressive" tolerance, empathy and understanding

Tim Graham at Newsbusters highlights the "progressive" penchant for tolerance, empathy and understanding ... except for when they disagree with you. In this case it's the WaPo's "humor" writer Gene Weingarten who "jokes" about St. Peter shooting the NRA's Wayne LaPierre in the crotch area:

I shall write some verse for my tomorrow's chat
About the Antichrist, a fetid presence in the air --
I speak of Lucifer, Old Scratch, the Stygian bat,
That dastard, truth's assassin: Wayne LaPierre.
Twenty children dead, and also adults six
Slain by yet another madman a-hole with a gun
Too easily obtain'd; Wayn'd solve it with a fix--
More arms for a-holes! That's the ticket, son.
In Wayne's World, no problem lacks a cure:
Violence begets violence, so he'll say
Arm yourself some more, to feel secure
Against the guy who we armed yesterday,

Others in the public eye are filth and slime
(O'Reilly milks our hate and offers bitter brew on tap)

But Wayne's misdeeds will more withstand the test of time --
Standing as he does before us, unashamed and full of crap.
A toast then, to our friend Wayne LaPierre
For whom gun deaths have been a lucky totem
Methinks St. Peter will espy him, standing there
And smile, and aim a 30-30 at his scrotum.

Nice. I wonder if this brilliant "humorist" ever saw fit to write a "funny" poem about another controversial topic that has to do with human lives (and the elimination thereof) -- something like, y'know, abortion. If so, maybe it went something like this:

On a fateful day back in 1973
Seven justices set forth a ruling with glee
In our Founding document they discovered a right
which to unborn children was a fateful "good night"
Norma McCorvey set in motion an evil
Confirmed with a bang of Chief Justice Burger's gavel

Millions of babies killed for convenience
"Hands of my body" scream the liberal pundits
Concerned more about criminals and capital punishment
"Celebrates death!" they say to our amusement
Maybe St. Peter will have harsh words for Blackmun
Smiting him down with an illegal handgun.

Gee, can I have a job now as a "humorist?" Unlikely. Hypocritical lunkheads like Weingarten will dub my screed "sexist" and "patriarchal" and then blacklist me as "one of them."

Posted by Hube at March 27, 2013 12:36 PM | TrackBack

Comments  (We reserve the right to edit and/or delete any comments. If your comment is blocked or won't post, e-mail us and we'll post it for you.)

I think you've missed your mark. While he's certainly liberal, Weingarten wouldn't let that stand in the way of writing a good conservative -themed poem, and you're gonna have to buy a bigger probe if you want to touch his sensitive places with insult. The man's got a pretty thick skin.

Not only would Weingarten be perfectly willing to write a poem on the theme you've suggested, but I'd imagine it would be a great deal more graphically offensive AND poetically competent than your example. It's my humble opinion that you're in over your head here.

Posted by: Bob S. at August 27, 2013 03:55 PM

LOL ... "poetically competent," eh? Like the one quoted above? Thanks for the giggles.

FWIW I came up w/mine in about five minutes. I imagine Weingarten took at least 10 times that.

Posted by: Hube at August 27, 2013 05:10 PM

LOL... trolls are always worth a few laughs.

Posted by: Carl at August 27, 2013 05:14 PM

Post a comment

Remember personal info?