July 25, 2006

"I don't know, sue everybody!"

Anyone an old "Jerky Boys" fan? Remember that riotous call they made to that lawyer wanting to sue for an ambiguous "punitive damages"? The JBs frustrated, the dialogue goes as follows:

"Well, would it be possible to sue you people?"
"Sue me? Why would you sue me? What are talking about?"
"Punitive damages."
"Yeah, but why would you sue me?"
"I don't know, sue everybody!"

That's the way it's going, apparently. Check it:

In Detroit, a group called the American-Arab Anti-Discrimination Committee has filed a suit on behalf of about 30 people charging that "the federal government has failed to protect Americans from the fighting in Lebanon. ... The committee is asking the court to order Washington to request a cease-fire between Israel and Lebanon."

A commenter on that post notes "Sounds like somebody didn't read the fine print on their passport..." And, nothing like attempting to make foreign policy via lawsuit! But it ain't over yet:

Three Israeli lawyers are planning a lawsuit in U.S. courts demanding compensation from the government of Lebanon for war damage to property and businesses in northern Israel.

Can't let the Arabs have all the fun, right? Still, this makes quite a bit more sense than the previous suit. But hold on -- the Lebanese are saying "nyah, nyah":

And according to news agencies, the government of Lebanon itself intends to demand billions of dollars from the government of Israel to compensate for the damage done by its bombardment. Curiously nothing is said in coverage of this last story about resorting to the U.S. courts -- you mean there's some other place to take a grievance?

Indeed! But probably not as lawsuit friendly, that's for sure.

Maybe if the Lebanese had muzzled Hizbollah, y'know, there might not be a need for the second noted suit, which would have led to no need for the silly subsequent countersuit!

Posted by Hube at July 25, 2006 02:40 PM | TrackBack

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In a related story, Hezbollah sues Israel in the 9th Circuit for damages to rocket arsenal. "I mean, how are we supposed to kill civil...uh...zionist oppressors if they keep blowing up our rockets?" said a Hezbollah member who requested anonymity.

Posted by: Duffy at July 25, 2006 03:10 PM